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"A way of seeing"

October 25, 2018

 

I've been talking with former students to get a better sense of what their lives are like as they navigate their twenties. One told me that at 23 she had decided to enter society, that she found something she wants to do and wants to work towards it. 

 

Here's some of her thoughts:

 

So it’s time for me to enter society and get to work cuz the work isn’t going anywhere. I’m very maternal and I have a vision of my child self burned into my mind and I want to help her. In my momma-mode I can do anything, even grow up.

 

As a person in their twenties, one of the humbling realizations is that it never ends. All the things you hope would go away when you got older, don’t. You must learn to accept them. The burdens don’t get lighter, you just get used to carrying them. 

 

The realization is incredibly humbling. I can’t be the Messiah. I can’t be Jesus. But it makes life easier, more comfortable and manageable. Thats why I want to work. I want to change the world, and I will always work with that goal in my heart, but I have to start small. I want to practice so that if a time ever comes—and it may not—for me to do something that will have a significant impact, I will be as ready as I can be. Also, I’ve realized that what I want to do is old-people work. It’s not to be done by young people like myself. So it is best for me to have patience, or I will make the same mistakes that every other over-eager child has made. Much easier said than done.

 

I get the sense that what I want to do takes a kind of contemplation that happens over time. It needs experience. It is not willful, or effortful. It is a way of seeing. So you have to develop sensitivities so that you can “just know” how it’s going to turn out and that takes regular practice. And is much more about consistency as opposed to effort. I think to be able to do the work that I want to do, I have to just practice it every day and at some point down the road I will know.

 

 

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